Dear Friends and Family,

You have not heard from me in a great while. I have been content to let John speak for himself and to keep my life to myself. However, several people asked me to write, and I have some logistical information to relay to you.

Things have really stabilized since John quit chemo and went on his plan of raw food, exercise and meditation. It has frankly been a bit like vacation all the time. Now, we don't have to plan everything around chemo - sick one week, relatively well the next. Nor, do we feel like frantically visiting every person and place we wanted to see before he dies. (This second change probably relates more to having tired ourselves out than to quitting chemo.) We have settled. John still goes away often for retreats while the kids and I stay home, slow and steady (or as much so as I can pull off). The kids have all gone back to homeschooling, the educational choice that makes our family most comfortable. I have hired someone to help me with their schooling, the basic childcare, housework, meal preparation, bookkeeping, and filing. I call her a Governess, but a friend of mine exclaimed when I described her, "Martha you got a wife!" If she were a wife, she'd be a good one, she responds seamlessly to changing circumstances, has a basically positive outlook, is very organized and tidy, has brilliant bookkeeping skills, speaks four languages, works beautifully with the children, has raw food preparation skills, has a 12 year-old son who gets along well with William, and goes home at night. What more could a person want?

As you probably gleaned from the existence of a new employee, our financial situation has changed drastically. I sell Real Estate and invest aggressively. Also, our luck seems to have turned in favor of money, as if deciding that we really wanted and deserved it made it flow in. In any case, you do not need to send us donations anymore. In fact, you can't, because the church that processed them has closed that branch of its good works department. They asked me to stop donations STAT. I would, however, appreciate any business you throw my way. I primarily help people find investments, residential and commercial in California and out of state. However, I also do some business in single-family homes in Ojai. Out-of-state and out-of-area referrals will give me 25% of their commission. Though relatively new at selling Real Estate, I have been working with my parents on Real Estate investments and management for 20 years. So, keep me in mind in any of the above categories.

John's health remains compromised, but shows light-years improvement over recent months. Abdominal pain affects his sleep at night, and overall weakness (toxicity levels?) affect his ability to move through a long day, deal with too much confusion, or to process and retain information. (The dealing with confusion part presents a real challenge in a house with three small children!) Still, nobody here complains, the ability to spend time with him out of bed and to watch him pursue his interests thrills us. He exercises, doing Tae Kwon Do and Kyudo (contemplative archery). He reads, plays with the kids, plays guitar, meditates, and experiments with raw food. His neuropathy has improved to the extent that we've considered taking up surfing together again. Friday night, he went dancing with the kids. What a joy to be a part of!

Now, in case this picture has become blindingly sunny, I'll tell you the dark underside that you have come to expect from me. With all of this personal growth work that we both do, we challenge one another regularly. Growing pains have become a regular feature of our relationship these days. Picture two people chopping away at themselves, handing one another the axe whenever it falls. Here we stand, bloody, crying, and basically thrilled.

John still has Pancreatic Cancer, so we don't bank on his health staying this way. Besides, I think our emotional banks got washed away several tidal waves ago. For a while, we were like those thrill seeking surfers who go out on the big waves during a storm. Now, we just float in all kinds of weather!

I wish the best to you and yours.

Love,
Martha